He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
