Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I think im going to throw up on grandma
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
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