I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
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