the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
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