Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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