Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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