I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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