so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
