I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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