Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
false alarm. still invincible.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
