The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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