At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
