found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
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