My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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