people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
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