dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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