yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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