you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
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