At least make sure they are 18
Why
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
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