it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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