i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
