i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
