Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
is wine microwaveable?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
