Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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