Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
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