Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize