so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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