Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
