Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
