I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize