I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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