I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
