I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize