well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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