Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
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