He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize