im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
