No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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