Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
