Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
