If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
