Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
