i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
