why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
we're making bets on your personal life
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
