i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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