My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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