PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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