i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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