I think scott just propositioned me for sex
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
