Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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