so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
